okie-dokie

Above are some ridiculously badass oil paintings by Kevin Peterson which really struck a chord with me and resonated throughout my heartstrings. It was refreshing.

Creating This Symmetry has been an incredibly rewarding experience in so many aspects. We've gotten vast support locally and abroad in places we've never even imagined, but it was last night when I first encountered one of the negative aspects of running a visual blog. 

Scavenging through copious sources in the realms of the interweb, viewing beautiful image after beautiful image, I became conscious of my desensitization to...beauty. My attention span has greatly diminished, and what really gets me is the fact that I no longer think about what it is that affects me about certain things. It's just on to the next. And that is sad. 

I have felt guilty towards my relationship with art for a while now, and I think it is coming to a climax. Art does so much for me, yet I don't feel I have done enough for art. I have become lazy in exuding the appreciation and thought it deserves. Fuck, I havent even sat down and created something in months. Part of it has to do with the ongoing conundrum of originality, part of it has to do with my internal struggle for the unattainable state that is perfectionism. But I've made a semi-sincere vow to myself to become more aware and conscious of what it is I view. Because if I don't, then what's the point of it's existence? When I was little, my older brother and I always played the "Would You Rather" game. Once when we were in Norway on holiday, I specifically remember him asking me, "would you rather be nothing but a dreamer, or nothing but a cynic?". At the time, I didn't know what a cynic was, but I wanted to sound cool so that's what I chose. He scoffed at me, and that memory has stuck with me through all these years. As it turns out, I am quite the cynic. But that's something I wish to change. I want to be more of a dreamer. A dreamer who contributes to dreams.

How's that for a bunch of rambling bullshit?

-R